POLICEMEN AND BRIBES, WHOOPS I MEAN BRIDES

I thought the shot of the Hermitage was rather jolly. The other is a shot of the street where we live at present but not for much longer.

THE POLICEMAN`S LOT IS NOT A HAPPY ONE

It is quite difficult to know who is a policeman and who is not. I am convinced there are people who walk around this town dressed up as such just because once upon a time they had a uniform. Those are the most scary. You would think I could tell by the age of the uniform but unfortunately this is not so. Some police officers just look plain scruffy and not very professional. There are traffic police and another type or two all with different roles. There are a lot of them who seem to have little to do but stroll around the parks and public spaces. Their presence should be a comfort but I find it rather unsettling. I feel they would not do very much if they saw you being attacked but that they may apprehend you for doing absolutely nothing but minding your own business.

I have been told not to go anywhere without identification but not the original because it might get stolen and never hand over original documents to the police themselves! What!?

I was sitting in the summer gardens yesterday, minding my own business and reading a book. It was a beautiful day and I do not have a balcony at the flat. I am a middle aged woman dressed in a conventional manner with a Laura Ashley bag and sensible shoes, reading Nicholas and Alexandra on a park bench in the sunshine when along comes a policeman who stands right in front of me (am I allowed to read the above-mentioned book in Russia?), weighs me and the situation up and then walks away. I have to say my heart was in my mouth, I really thought he was going to ask me what I was doing there! He had a cosh in his hand and handcuffs and a gun in his back pocket. I hardly dared to look up until he walked off! Is this just a park keeper?

When I had lunch with the ladies the other day in Gatchina, we set up our picnic in the park on the steps of an old folly of sorts. A policeman came up to us and stood looking at our picnic before telling the Russian lady amongst us to leave as soon as we finished! Had our Russian lady not been there I think we would have offered him a chicken leg and a glass of champagne but we felt she would think it inappropriate.

ANTI-INTERROGATION CARD

This is the coolest thing I have ever had in my life and I intend to frame it when I leave Russia. If you have any trouble with officials or police or anybody, you pull out the card and call the 24 hour service and they send a minder (well, someone) out to you to deal with the problem! Quite an enterprising business idea!

Part of me really wants something to happen so I can use this facility and part of me thinks it might not work!

BRIDES EVERYWHERE!

It must be because it`s summer. This has to be the most romantic city in the world. Although I have been told that the guys don`t keep up the romance once married.

Having been made man and wife, they cruise the city with all their guests in limousines and with copious amounts of alcohol and have photos taken at every famous monument in the city. There are loads of these so by the time the guests have been dragged around all of them they look pretty much past their best! You see about fifty brides per day at the moment and many empty champagne bottles around the town. It astonishes me that all these smartly dressed people don`t take their empties away with them. They have a way to go in that respect.

GOSTINY DVOR

This is an experience of a shopping centre. It is really huge and houses just about every type of shop imaginable and is all indoors. I remember visiting this when I was here in about 1980. At that time there was absolutely nothing available and all the tinned food had plain labels just with the name of the content, e.g. peas. I can remember being amazed that this huge shopping palace had all the shops selling exactly the same items. All the clothes were the same in all the shops and the tinned food (because that was all there was) was piled up to make it look attractive but it was all the same! It really is wonderful to see Gostiny Dvor today, a symbol of devotion to consumerism.